I Do Horrible Drawings 1

Hello friends! Today, I am going to be starting a new series on my blog about an activity I really enjoy.

That activity is drawing! I love to draw. It feels like I get to be creative after long hours of academic research and studying. What I can draw is limitless; I feel like a little kid again. Crayons, colored pencils, pen: they all get me going. I go cray for cray pas.

And I can draw anywhere, any time: Airplane? Just give me a napkin and pen, and I’ll create a masterpiece drawing of the man sitting next to me. Relaxing at home? Printer paper and colored pencils I kept from high school can create an awesome forest scene complete with the sun wearing sunglasses (I cant be the only one). Pooping? Drawing pad app gets the job done as I get the job done. Driving? Maybe not.

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No, a five year old didn’t draw this. I did five minutes ago.

There is a catch: I’m not the best drawer. Actually, I’m pretty awful. I would describe my style as “Napoleon Dynamite’s promposal picture”.  I love to draw, but the drawings never come out how I picture them in my mind. It’s like I tell my hand to do one thing, but it goes rogue and does something completely different. The shapes and color combinations I see in my head never quite translate how my brain visualizes. Circles become ovals, hands become clubs or demon claws, and people I love become scary malformed witches.

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I take a lot of inspiration from Napoleon, as you’ll see.

It becomes especially apparent when I draw people, which happens to be my favorite thing to draw. My friends, and myself, think they’re actually pretty funny. So why not put myself out there on the internet for other people to laugh at? The important thing is that my art brings joy and laughter, even if it is because of how unfortunate and awry my drawings go.

So here they are in all their glory. (Keep this in mind: I really am trying to replicate the photos when I draw. I don’t mean to make them bad/weird looking/make my friends look like creatures from the Lord of the Rings).

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These are of my friend’s dog, Mabel. These are probably the best of the bunch (let that sink in. These are the best I got). I remember being really proud of the drawing on the lower right because I thought the bodice of Mabel looked exactly like the picture. Looking back, I still think this. The two little teeth in the left-most pictures are also dead on. *pats self on back*

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This drawing was done the same day as the drawings of the dog. I was clearly feeling inspired. This is that same friend’s sister. I remember being really proud of the hand nearest to the straw; I thought I nailed the fingers curvature. Looking back, that hand looks like an eagle’s claw (reference below). I laughed to myself when I drew this.

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uncanny

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This is my friend whose dog I made to look terrifying and whose sister I practically insulted with the above picture! Honestly, I don’t know where to start with this one. The eyes are not even on the same level, the teeth make me uncomfortable, and the hands look like one of those claws on a stick that they sell in every museum gift shop mixed with a forest demon’s hand (see below for reference). With this piece, it is important to take note of the small details. Notice the earring, the necklace, the forehead wrinkles, and the smile line. Clearly, I was emphasizing features that I likely could’ve ignored (and perhaps my friend would have wanted me to ignore), but I’m not that kind of artist.

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Basically the hands I drew on my friend. I’m so sorry Grace.

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This is my other friend. We decided one day to buy sketchbooks and go into Starbucks and draw each other/strangers around us (let me know if you want to see the other drawings from that sketchbook. Pretty awful). Again, it helps me to focus on the details. The lines of her shirt took me a good five minutes. The earring is also depicted. There are just a couple of minor faults. The notebook somehow became 2-D, the hands look like drumsticks, the pencil is apparently balancing on top of her hand instead of being grasped, and the face I drew literally looks nothing like my friend. Just a couple of faults.

11267356_10206023436618294_3280025743403255065_n-1This is probably the worst I’ve ever done. The sad part is this is probably the one I worked the hardest on making look exactly like the photo. As with the picture of my other friend, the teeth here make me really uncomfortable. Not sure why. The proportions of the face are just out of control. The right eye. The nose. The hair. There’s no words.

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These next two pictures I did today! This one really isn’t that bad (except the hand. Looks like a flipper). The head shape could be a little better, and the sweatshirt lettering mysteriously is different in my version. The glasses could’ve been done more accurately (meaning the same size) and the neck could use a bit of thickness, but overall this isn’t too bad.

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This one, on the other hand, is that bad. It makes my friend look like a melted possessed doll from that movie House of Wax. I somehow made the happy and bright photo into a sad and scary spaghetti-haired witch. I can’t even look directly at it; it feels like it would suck out my soul if I did. The teeth, yet again, make me super uncomfy. The hand looks like Cheetos connected together and wrapped around a piece of poo (it was supposed to be the ice cream cone). The nose and smile lines make her look 1000 years old. On the bright side, I think I did an alright job on the creamsicle ice cream’s color and blending.

These are just some of my pieces from my extensive portfolio. As I said, I love drawing. So if you’d like me to draw something in particular, if you’d like me to draw you, then please feel free to send me a request and a reference picture (please. I love drawing and need more people to draw besides my 3 friends). You could be featured on the next post of this series. Or you could be exhibited in a fancy gallery, as I’m sure my work will make it there some day. You could be hanging up in the MoMA in a couple of years.

The message here is: do what you love, even if you’re not the best. It’s fucking fun.

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